The Davidsonian

Underwear with King Princess logo

How to Get the Most out of Your King Princess Merch Underwear

As some Davidson students are already aware (because I saw you there), the talented sex icon/musician (in that order) King Princess had a show in Charlotte last week. It was, in summation, a queer femme convention. Between smoldering at the audience and stripping off their “69% angel” shirt, you could say they were giving the audience a show. 

At the end of the night, plenty of people made their way back to the merch table to go home with their own sex iconography to remember their brush with hitting the back. One of the exclusively overpriced items of clothing that one could choose to walk away with was a pair of tighty whities with a simple, tasteful “KP” embroidered smack dab in the middle of the waistband (see image for the real life thing). I immediately wanted to know not so much who decided to buy this truly one-of-a-kind pair of underwear, but what occasion one would decide to whip it out for. Below are what I envision to be a few ways to get the most bang for your buck:

1. A la Calvin from Calvin and Hobbes, these “KP” embroidered undies can become your pair of lucky rocketship underwear. On days you have a tough exam or particularly grueling meeting, you can wear them to give you that extra boost you need. Like Calvin, you’ll probably wonder what the point of wearing them is if no one’s going to ask you to see them, too.

2. Following the above point about visibility: Captain Underpants style, over the clothes. Otherwise, how is anyone going to know that you’re a serious King Princess fan?

3. Keep just the waistband showing above your pants. Simple, no-nonsense, gets the point across. 

4. Alternative hat–could be especially helpful if you have long hair and want to wear pigtails.

5. Not so much a fashion use, but I also immediately thought “coffee filter” when I saw it. Do with that what you will.

Of course, a foreseeable problem with styles 2, 3, and 4 is that people might see you proudly parading your “KP” undies and think that it’s just your initials (we all know those parents who branded every single item of clothing that their kids have before sending them off to college). You might want to add a few of your own embellishments to really get the point across, especially because tighty whities provide so much extra blank canvas. Consider, for example, writing in sharpie right below the “KP” insignia, something along the lines of “As in King Princess – the hot singer who had that one hit song 1950 and is just generally an icon for the queer community.” Adding a line like this could clear up a lot of confusion and shorten/completely circumvent future conversations you might have about the subject, or potentially anything else. 

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published.