It looks like Davidson College has seen the last of its honored tradition "A Night With the ‘Cats," the dance performances that highlight the beginning of the men's and women's basketball seasons. 

On a jam-packed, festive night that included tributes to Miley Cyrus, Michael Jackson, Slumdog Millionaire, rock n' roll, Beyoncé and even an enthusiastic President Ross's participation in the finale, several problems arose. 

"I am disgusted," spat one townie mother afterwards.  "Those could not have been the men's and women's basketball teams; the dancing was far too graphic and professional. Those girls were gyrating and grinding as though they were in a rap video! And the men weren't any better – several groups wore pants that were entirely too tight and revealing. It was so vulgar, I had to cover my children's eyes! One group wore tattoos all up and down their arms, while others had dyed their hair pink! I must say, these are not the kinds of role models I expected my children to find at Davidson." 

Another discrepancy is now being battled in medical court by one basketball player whom, inflicted with a severe concussion due to a misstep in her dance, actually passed out and vomited several times due to exposure to the strobe lights and overbearing sound system at dress rehearsal and was forced to participate despite her condition.