Jacob Hege

Staff Writer

October 31st is this Saturday, and we all know what that means: HALLOWEEN! Objectively the best holiday ever (who doesn’t love free candy?). You’ve probably had your costume planned for weeks, months, or even years! Or, you’re like me and you totally forgot that Halloween is this close and have absolutely NO IDEA what to wear out this weekend. Well, have no fear, because I am here to help you. I’m not going to tell you what to wear; I mean, you have to do some part of the work! But what I have done is compile a short list of dos and don’ts to ensure your Halloween costume reigns supreme down at Martin Court this All Hallows Eve.


1. Be as creative as possible. A wizard? Are you five? A ‘cereal killer’? Come on. No, go deeper, people. I’m talking a porcupine in a pantsuit (Carol Quill-en?). Mix it up and don’t be afraid to be original.

2. Be as weird as possible. It may feel like it’s too out there – but if so, it may just be the perfect costume. (Shout out to Conor Hussey and Scotty Poston, who went as a plug and an outlet last year!) Seriously, keep it weird Wildcats.

3. Be as cost efficient as possible. Why buy an $80 premade costume when you can most likely hit up Goodwill and a local craft store to make your own version of a popular costume for $10? It’s just common sense, people. And if you make the costume yourself, you automatically get even more creative points. Pro tip: just wear an old grocery bag – BOOM! Katy Perry costume – free.

4. Be as funny as possible. Halloween may be about scary costumes when you’re little, but now we all know what its really about – the Instagram likes. Keep the chainsaws and fake blood at home because funny costumes are what really bring the love on social media.


1. Reuse last year’s costume. Every Halloween is special and deserves its own costume. Besides, that superwoman costume you wore all throughout high school really isn’t as cool as you think it is.

2. DO NOT GO AS A MINION. Sure, Mary Rood Cunningham did it last year, and I guess she still has friends or whatever, but trust me: if you dress up as a minion, no one will ever talk to you again.

3. Go as something you don’t want to just because it’s part of a group costume. Okay, so all your friends are going as the “stages of Miley Cyrus.” So? The world can do without another iteration of VMAs Miley for one night. If your friends want to do a group thing but you think you have an even better idea, go for it. You miss 100% of the shots you never take.

4. Dress up as any sort of characterization of a culture that is not your own. Seriously. All jokes aside, while it may seem like a good idea to you, it may be pretty hurtful to other people, and everyone deserves to enjoy their Halloween without having their culture demeaned. It’s just not cool. Follow these eight simple rules and you just might (key word) have the best Halloween ever. If not, well that’s all on you and I have no idea what article you are talking about. Trick or treat!