E.H. LITTLE LIBRARY –– For Evan Scrooge ‘21, a Monday evening spent burrowed away in his basement library carrel did not turn out to be the “silent night” that the Philosophy major had envisioned. Scrooge, who had just settled down for a long winter’s study session at around 11:53 PM on Monday, was interrupted minutes later by a group of Christmas sweater-clad, sheet music-carrying students who began belting out classic Christmas hymns.
Scrooge was taken aback by the booming volume and alarming cheeriness of the puzzling library octet, several of whom he recognized from campus a capella groups. “They completely caught me off guard,” remarked a noticeably irritated Scrooge when contacted by The Yowl, “I was this close to solving the Trolley Problem, and these happy-go-lucky freaks just came out of nowhere and disrupted my stream of consciousness with ‘Deck the Halls.’ Fa la la la la, la la f*ck off!”
Unbeknownst to Scrooge, these students are part of a new college initiative dubbed “Christmas Carrel-ing” by library officials. The program, which began on December 1st and will last until the 18th, was instituted in an effort to ease the stress of students during the final exam period and the weeks leading up to it. At one-hour intervals lasting from midnight until 6:00 AM, groups of eight to ten students can now be found traversing the basement of E.H Little Library, serenading late-night carrel dwellers with uplifting Christmas tunes.
Dean of Student Affairs Ken Rudolph, who is largely responsible for the implementation of holiday carrel-ing, called the project “an incredible addition to finals culture at Davidson,” adding that the jolly late-night performances will “revolutionize our study spaces of campus and redefine how we think about exam period stress.” After student backlash to the tone-deaf “Lights On Davidson” initiative, Rudolph hopes that Christmas Carrel-ing will “make finals fun.”
The coalition of students that frequently inhabits base libs isn’t quite sold.
“I’m sorry, but how the hell is this helpful whatsoever?” said Jason Snow ‘22. “I don’t see how a bunch of a capella kids screaming ‘O Come All Ye Faithful’ at 2 AM is going to benefit me at all as I’m trying to finish a research paper.” Emmitt Sklar ‘21 echoed Snow’s skepticism, exclaiming, “Just leave me alone with Jstor and my demons! I don’t need this ‘Santa Claus is Coming to Town’ sh*t midway through an all-nighter.”
At press time, a group of carrel-ers was overheard in Sloan practicing a rendition of Kelly Clarkson’s “Underneath The Tree” called “You Can Get That B!” Per sources, it kinda slaps.